I know I shouldn’t pick favorites of the girls I coach. But of course I can’t avoid it
Natalie waited for me today when we had to walk downstairs, so that she could walk with me. She always looks so happy to see me. When we were walking she told me every single detail of everything she did on her birthday last friday. I’d been dying to know since a week ago, and her day sounded like the most perfect thing i’ve ever heard. If some guy ever breaks her heart, I’ll kill him.
Spenser. At the meet she clung to me so closely. I could tell how nervous she was. And during awards she placed first in almost everything, but sat in my lap the whole time.
"I didn’t think i’d be dating a fucking hoe when i asked you out, but i guess that’s what i did."
"You’re a fucking whore cara, a fucking skank bitch little slut, and you’re nothing. Cara you’re nothing."
how is it that last night i went to zach’s and talked to his mom for almost 2 hours. about my mom, and my dad, and her life, and everything. when everyone my age wasn’t even there. and i get home to you calling me the most awful things, saying i’m a liar and a whore and a cheater. i didn’t get with any guys last night, i couldn’t even do that to myself if i wanted to. and even though you’re on the phone calling me names, making fun of me, i had to go to bed worried about if you’d be okay. that’s not fair. aaron’s no help to you. i don’t want to worry.
you don’t seem to understand that i don’t want to/won’t get with any guys any time soon.
i had started to think i could start over, be okay. just after the beginning of last night.
the gym tonight was amazing. leaving at nine. lights went out at 830. i’ll hurt tomorrow but it’s the only thing i have passion for. to work for. and it kills me that i can’t even really have this either.
i don’t look the same as i used to in any of my leos
back then i know i was always worried about looking fat, but that could just be because i was in the gym everyday staring at myself along mirror covered walls